Home Architecture Talk - I have a huge problem I really need some advice adults only?

I have a huge problem I really need some advice adults only?

Hello, my husband and I have our own business. (landscape architecture) based out of our home. We have a huge house no kids yet because we plan on having that when I graduate from the ultrasound program next year. I will be an ultrasound tech. Anyways, due to the economy going down and things we are barely making ends meat. We purchased this house to have a family in a year and a half. Well, our business isn't doing so well anymore and my husband said that because I am a magazine model as well he feels that I should be an adult star like a topless high paid dancer traveling from strip club to strip club on the weekends. So I was hesitant about it and since i am in ultrasound school this would help us keep our home. Our home is 3000 a month andi can make that in 2 weeks as an adult star feature entertainer. They want to hire me at 150 an hour for 3 hours a night and i will get a check at the end of the weekend. I felt uncomfortable with this kind of was thinking yes I can do this then I felt like I didnt want to because I tired it before and my husband said he didnt like it but now he is telling me i really need to do this so we can keep our house. I told him we can move out and sell our house and rent a house and i won't have to do it and we can get caught up with the irs which we still owe 70 grand for not paying them. If we stay in this house then I will have to strip for the clubs on weekends paid hourly cause i am a magazine model but i still wont' be able to pay the irs back only the bills if I stay here. If i move out into rental home i can pay back the irs and i wont have to strip at all. but he is mad he wants me to strip he wants to keep the house because he loves it here its our home and he has grown attached to it. What do you think it best he is making me feel like crap for how i feel. I feel that we should sell the house and move into rental and save money get out of debt with the irs and I won't have to get room mates and strip cause I will be in a rental home or stay in our big house and strip to help with the bills until the economy is doing better and also get room mates. What woud you do what decision would you make

Public Comments

Dang! thats long to read, just follow your heart
personally because you keep saying i am a magazine model i dont beleive a word of it ,but have a nice day anyway.
Don't do anything that you don't want to do. If your husband truly loved you he wouldn't want to "share" you like that with any man and he would respect you enough not to continue asking you when you said you were uncomfortable doing it. Tell him to go strip for money if he thinks that will solve all of your problems. He sounds very selfish to me. Let the house go and rent a house. The house doesn't make the home, the love and respect for each other inside a house does. Good luck and I hope this helps.
What husband would pressure his wife into showing off her body to others. well i this isn't unusual a lot of people have started stripping and all sorts to cope with the credit crunch. if you feel really uncomfortable with stripping than don't do it, but if you lose your house now it may take a long while to get it back; regards do what feels comfortable to you!
Amber sorry but I have to disagree with your husband's decision to try and have you stripping for cash again. What happens next when he wants for you to start turning tricks to earn even more extra cash. If you have to rent for a couple of years to get yourself back on track financially then it has to be that way. How in the hell would he feel if you were trying to convince him to strip for strange ladies, maybe that is not a good example as a lot of fellas would think that was cool. If you are really not comfortable with this then you need to explain it to him and not allow him to pressure you into doing something that you are not comfortable with. Best of luck.
I'm sorry you married a jerk who loves his house more then he respects your pride. I think you should sell your house and buy a smaller one. You don't need a HUGE house to raise kids in, and don't count on the economy getting better, because it's getting worse. Hope this helped, and good luck!:] Xoxo, Meaghan:]:]
Well you gotta pay the IRS. Move to another place, it's the obvious choice to me. And you won't have to strip.
This is a horrible situation for you, and your husband is behaving appallingly. You clearly do not want to do what he's asking of you so where on earth is his respect for you? It isn't just up to you to find a resolution to this problem anyway, but, sadly, by making the demands that he is, he's showing nothing but contempt for you. This is about so much more than finances - it's about the very foundations of your relationship. You are supposed to be a partnership; an equal partnership. That means trust, RESPECT, co-operation, give and take, and never, ever trying to force your partner to do something that makes them feel vulnerable or uncomfortable. I think the two of you need to go back to basics and get couples counselling. Something has gone very wrong for you both when your husband is looking to, basically, pimp you out. That doesn't help your finances in the immediate term, though, and I wonder if there's any kind of advisory body you can turn to for unbiased advice? Here in the UK, for instance, we have The Citizens Advice Bureau where we can get any kind of support ands advice, including debt. Failing that, I think you have to be really strong and insist that you do not want to comply with your husband's request. I know that will be tough, because he may blame you if you lose the house. But your dignity and self-respect matter more and, if you do get counselling, your husband should come to see that. In the end, though, if your husband reacts badly to your refusing to do what he wants, you may have to question whether you really want a future with someone who has so little respect and regard for you. I think you have a make or break situation here underneath it all. I wish you lots of luck.
Yes Amber I am sure that we in the Answers Community (or those that can think and spell) believe every word of it. Quite entertaining.
If you can only pay your bills and not irs and you don't want to go stripping then you should sell up now.If your husband loves this place so much tell him to go stripping,if you sell the place and can save you can always buy another house that you can raise a family in.I would sell and rent pay my debts,if you want to work for the magazine at weekends or strip it should be your Choice not your husbands.
I think there are two separate issues here, when you IRS I presume you are in the states rather then the UK because over here the Inland revenue would insist on payment and you cannot really not pay them but live in by your own description a huge house. Secondly you may have done magazine modelling but do you really want to join the bump and grind circuits of strip clubs and of course you would be paying tax on the money you earn working as a topless dancer. I believe you would be better of selling your house paying off your tax debts and renting for a while, unless you don't mind doing the topless dancing. Having paid the tax on money earned would you be better off
if he loves you he shouldn't make you take that decision, or take it for you. why doesn't he get a job with better money to pay for the house? try finding other jobs that don't imply stripping. that's awkward. what are you gonna tell your kids in 10 years? see this house? mommy had to dance naked in strip clubs to pay for it! it's your life and it seems like you have to strip in order to keep your man happy. isn't he thinking of a rented house at all? try to make him more reasonable. if that doesn't work... then strip. what doesn't a woman do to keep her marriage and life....?